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This space was never intended to celebrate anything White Soxian…but when something’s perfect, it’s perfect.
Bring in the skinny lefty from the pen. We’re fucking desperate for a 1-2-3 inning.
Can you imagine the national devastation if this cat Barack were to ‘Blagojevich’ it? Oprah would eat her way into a diabetic coma.
1/20/09 is finally here. We made it. Today begins a whole new world.
GObama, baby.
Isn’t it great to see Ohio State lose at anything? Much less a devastating bowl loss to the very team screwed outta the BCS Championship.
Colt McCoy is fast becoming a Texas-sized hero down Austin way. We don’t say this lightly…but he looked positively Elway-esque tonight in the 2009 Fiesta Bowl while leading the Longhorns to a last second 24-21 victory. Quan Cosby had his best game as a Longhorn, hauling in 14 balls for 171 and two scores including the game winner with just :16 left.
Rod Tidwell would be proud.
Minnesota Twins owner Carl Pohlad died today at the tender age of 93. Not only was Pohlad one of the richest men in America, he was a solid baseball man and all-around good egg. He will be missed.
Kick the shit outta those pansy-ass Buckholes!
Congrats Jim Hendry. You finally have the left-handed right fielder which you have so openly conveted. ESPN.com is reporting that the Chicago Cubs have signed oft-troubled free-agent Milton Bradley to a three year, $30 million contract.
Thus endeth the 2009 season, and perhaps Hendry’s tenure as Cubs G.M.
Sure, on the surface, Bradley seems like a decent enough financial risk. $10M per for a guy that can hit .320 with 20+ bombs and has a pretty good eye at the plate seems like a steal. Until you look deeper, of course.
Bradley is a super-douche who is now gonna feel as if he is the missing link for a 97-win playoff disappointment. Alfonso Soriano felt that way a few years ago, too. Those two are gonna have a very hard time coexisting in that tiny Wrigley Field clubhouse.
In Bradley’s nine year career, due to injuries, he has only played in 126 games more than once. Which means he’s injury prone. Te-fucking-riffic. Now the Cubs have 2 high-priced, injury prone knuckleheads in the outfield.
And let’s not overlook that famous Bradley temper. No, no, no.
This is Bradley’s eighth team in nine MLB seasons!! That is a classic Clubhouse Cancer resume. Does Hendry think drunken Bleacher Bums are gonna give Bradley a pass out there in right? That is hallowed ground once prowled by such Cub legends as the ‘Sweet Swinger’…the ‘Hawk’…and, of course, ‘Zonk’. For better or worse, it’s gonna be Brooklyn ’47 out there for the first few weeks. Ask Jacque Jones. Can Bradley handle the rowdy right-field faithful? History screams ‘NO!’
Oh, and just so you know…“LEFT…FIELD…SUCKS!!”
We predict the injury bug to bite the 2009 Cubs hard. With no Mark DeRosa to clean up the mess, it is gonna be a long, long season. Against our better judgment, we truly believed in ’08. Not anymore. You taught us another lesson, baseball gods. The glass is half empty for a couple more decades. We have seen this desperation many times before.
Only one scenario makes sense:
Doom.
